Friday, December 28, 2007

The Cell Epidemic

What in the hell did people do before the cell phone epidemic? I mean how did our parents know where we were 99% of the time? How did we find a place without using our cell phones to ask for directions? What did we do if we were going to be late to a friend's party because of traffic or getting lucky? What did we do before the world of texting?

How the hell did we survive? We did just fine. But today if someone loses their cell phone their world damn near comes to an end.

I am not saying I am not affected by this epidemic. I am. I own a cell phone. I use it when I land into civilization and I make my 900 phone calls because I actually have service. I don't text because I don't have the service. I just chose not to have the service. I hang up usually when I walk into a store. I don't answer it during dinner and if I must, I step outside. Could I live without it? Yes.

And it is the texting that brought me to this blog. April 23, you know what happened on that day in history? A 13 year-old girl won $25,000. Not for shooting the most baskets during the national championship hoop shoot contest. They still have those too, but you don't win $25,000 when you win. Winners receive trophies and plaques. What in the hell is this world coming to. That girl said she sends 4,000 texts a month. A month. And um, we can't figure out why we are becoming obese?

Last night I went to Charlie Wilson's War. A true story. I was generous and moved my seat so a couple could sit next to each other in the packed theater. And once again that karma bit me in the ass. The movie hadn't started and the teenage couple sitting next to me were fiddling with their cell phones. I figured turning them off as the damn screen had just asked. Then the movie started. Within seconds the cell phone's lcd lit up and young girl picked it up and texted back. I looked over at the guy a few minutes later and he was texting as well. 10 minutes into the movie when it lit up for about the 20th time, I calmly leaned over and said in my most calm voice...


I made sure my hands were clasped to the armrests when she answered---probably. I said who in the hell can not wait 2 hours. She said my mom. Then he answered another text. I figure they were actually texting each other. It wasn't the click click click that was bothering me but the damn light from the phone.

I took a deep breath and let her go about lying to her mom about where she was. At one point she got up and left. I figured to use the bathroom. I almost reached over and grabbed the phone and threw it at the back of her head as she walked away and yelled DON'T FORGET TO TEXT WHILE IN THE RESTROOM. After returning, her mom must have decided enough texting because it slowed down.

When the movie ended, I wanted to lean over and quietly ask in my calm voice: I didn't really understand the movie, could you explain it to me? But I didn't want to embarrass her or of course to interrupt her texting.

So people put down the cell phone for a few minutes a day, enjoy the sunshine, the look in another's eyes, a movie, a baseball game, and everything in between. Life isn't always about being in touch and having the phone glued to ear or fingers.

Saturday, December 01, 2007

A moment at Starbucks

I had a rough night last night. I have learned this year that it is ok to cry when things are troubling one. I have learned to shed the machoness some people say I portray. And so last night I thought of friends in low places and wish I could be there to hold them, to catch their tears, and to make sure they are taking care of themselves in addition to taking care of others. That crying carried over to this morning when I had to drive 30 minutes to Starbucks.

Now, please don't think I am addicted to Starbucks or coffee that I would drive 30 minutes for a cup of Joe. No, I went to town for something else, grocery shopping which I did and Starbucks happened to be there so I went inside and order a Grande Eggnog Latte. Well that is what I think I ordered. At least that is what I hope I ordered.

I was about third in line. Waiting near the stirring and sugar table were three ladies of three generations. Great grandma, grandma, and granddaughter. They were dressed up and I want to say almost to the point of the 1800s, but not quite. That is what went through my mind when I saw them. They were talking to a couple. The generation-ers came from money you could tell, but they were talking to common folk. This is just my opinion honestly, but to my observation that is what I came up with.

At the far cash register was a woman in a gray sweatshirt. She was definitely common folk. And in front of me was Danny. He ordered an apple cider something, but I only know this because they were out and said Danny we will give you a refund. It was busy as all get out and the line was starting out the door. I was in a world of my own, but taking in the world around me as well. I watched as Granddaughter came over to the counter to retrieve her pastry. I watched as she attempted to balance one cup on top of the other and reach for her pastry. I almost reached around Danny to grab the pastry because I could see that Granddaughter was going to drop the Raspberry drink. And sure enough she did. I don't think it got on Gray and Danny, but it was going all over the floor. Granddaughter was of course embarrassed at all get out and G-Grandma was asking to make another and she would pay for it.

Danny just stood there and order his not to be had apple cider thing. But Gray took action. She hollered for her dad to go to the bathroom and get papertowels. She said give me a towel and I will clean it up. She realized they were busy and didn't have time for a clean up especially in front of the counter. She kept assuring Granddaughter that things happen and it was no big deal. The employee mopped it up, but Gray still had her Dad go get the papertowels to wipe up the wetness. I had already ordered my Eggnog Latte after helping move something so the employee could mop. As her dad was wiping it up, another man in line said don't do that, they will take care of it. I thought he would probably be the one to complain that his drink was taking too damn long as well. I walked over to the stirring and sugar table to wait.

I was standing next to Gray's dad and she was standing at the pickup counter. Actually she was pretty excited about Granddaughter's drink because it did smell pretty damn good. I love that we pay 5 bucks for a milk mixed with raspberries and heated. Couldn't we do that with Nestle Quick? Anyway, she had a big order as she got out a carrier. I was listening to her and her dad talk. Then I heard Eggnog Latte. Well that is what I thought I heard. She picked it up and started to hand it to me, well honestly her father, but I grabbed it. I said sorry, did you order this as well. They said yes, but take it. I said no. They insisted because they had a few more drinks and they would just take mine. I said thank you and as I turned to leave she said have a great day. As I walked out, I thought did I order the same thing they did? But would it matter because I am pretty sure she would take whatever I ordered.

I was walking to my vehicle and checking for my keys. I couldn't find them, but as I looked towards my vehicle, they were hanging in the door lock. Holy hell, I live in California and I just left my keys out in the open for everyone to steal. Crazy.

But I can't get over Gray. Her attitude this morning gave me renewed hope for life. I shouldn't say life, but it gave me hope for something. I was saying if everyone was like her in the world, we wouldn't have all the violence we have going on and hatred. How hard is it to just give out random acts of kindness. I am not saying every day, but once in a while.

With Christmas around the corner, lets try it. When you see the guy standing on the corner with the sign saying something that might not be true, oh well throw him a buck today. Don't think go get a job. I know I am guilty of it too. While standing in line at Starbucks, reach in front of the person in line who just ordered and tell the cashier you will pay for their order. Take a bag of food and place it on a doorstep that you know could use it more than you. Reach out and touch someone like you would like if you were circling the drain. Just be kind!!!

Happy Holidays.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Life as a Ranger

The photos in this post are very graphic. If you have a weak stomach or prefer not to see a dead deer who has been gnawed upon STOP. If you are an EMS geek, go forth!

Last night after driving 6 hours with a 30 minute break to pick up two vehicles, I was approached by the intern who said "I guess we are dealing with a dead deer tomorrow". I said I had no idea what you are talking about, but if the boss said so, guess we are heading to check it out. I knew there had been a report of a dead deer near the entrance to the Balconies Cave.

When I went into the office, I told Boss that I thought when I returned to PINN that I would not be having to haul carcasses around like the last time I worked here. Guess I was wrong.

So this morning, Chris and I started out the Old Pinn Trail toward the caves. We had a lot of different reports--it was in the cave, it was on the east side, it was on the west side, etc. We located the little guy right before the cave on the east side. It was laying in some water. It was very obvious that it had recently been eaten upon as there was a fresh mark on its right hind quarter. I immediately looked up the slope expecting to see the mountain lion. Wanting desperately to see the mountain lion. I am not kidding when I looked about every minute to that slope.

I decided to drag him up the slope and place behind some bushes. My thinking had two-fold...1. Visitors would not be able to see it and 2. Visitors would most likely miss the cat chowing on it and not get freaked out. So I told Chris my plan and we started up the slope to check the area out. I heard him say "hi kitty". Now when I think Kitty out in the woods, I am not thinking of Sharon's house cats, I am thinking large mountain lion. My hand quickly went down to my gun. Then I saw the bobcat staring at us. He/she was probably wondering why the heck we were messing with the deer it had just been chowing on. Surprisingly, it did not immediately run away, but stayed and watched us for a while. And of course I had already snapped the dead deer photos so I put my camera away.

We climbed back down, slipped on latex and leather gloves, and I reached into the water and pulled up a leg. It was then we realized that it did actually have 4 legs as initially we thought the front left had been chewed away. We drug him up the slow and placed him nicely behind the bushes and climbed back down. I tried to coaxed Bobby back, but it didn't happen.

Within minutes of finishing our activity visitor upon visitor started to pass us. And to think not one of them knew a dead deer was up there. And when Bobby or Kitty came to eat the rest of it, they probably wouldn't see them either.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

And I Regress

Death #6 welcomed into my world on Monday. My dad's long time companion, Nora, passed away in a hospital in California. She was in her late seventies and was this time battling pneumonia. I say this time because this is a woman who had battled cancer numerous times and beat it each time. She had a type of shitty ass cancer that would go into remission and then reappear several years later.

When I was 12 years old, she became my doubles partner even though there was about 40 + years between us. Obviously, we weren't playing in the juniors, but local tennis tournaments around our area in Havasu. We were a tough team and I have many trophies to show we kicked ass.

She had become a mainstay in our family many years ago. She would be at our holiday activities, reunions, grandkid's activties, and everything in between. And she was still very active with golf, traveling, and enjoying life.

She will be greatly missed in our lives.

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Movin' On Over

Howdy to the few that drop by to say hello and see if I am still kicking. I am definitely still kicking and sometimes screaming as well, but as I have said a few posts down, I attempt to progress. And so I guess in a sense I am progressing...
Sometime, when the government decides to tell me when, I will be moving back to California. The move is unfortunate and fortunate all in the same sentence. It is unfortunate because I leave behind my boyfriend and my dog. She knows something is brewing as I am stacking boxes after boxes in the spare bedroom. She refuses to leave my side and jumps into bed as much as she can. It is unfortunate that one agency can't pull their heads out of their ass and offer me a job even though they have two that were available. But that is the government for you. It is unfortunate because my rent is going to be out of this world. It is fortunate because I will be working at a place where upper management actually supports you and is willing to work with you in every aspect. It is fortunate because this may lead into a permanent job (no guarantees). I just haven't figured out which out weighs the other.
So sometime soon, I will pack up the u-haul, stop at IKEA to purchase some more furniture and head west again. I will keep you posted. May be some new adventures will come of this...

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Pronghorns & Owls

I figured I better put something up a little more enjoyable than death...

Saturday, July 14, 2007

I attempt to Progress

The year is 2007. The Year of the Pig. And for me, the year of Hell, death, regret, and living fuller and stronger.

February 2007---into the hospital for a 7,000 dollar hernia operation. Pain was terrible and continues to be bothersome at times.

April 2007--A co-worker , Gary, is diagnosed with stomach cancer. We will beat it!

April 2007--A friend is killed in a car accident. Ryan was a teacher and his last words were "I love my life".

May 2007--I respond to a rescue at Devils Garden with CPR in progress. Ends up being a teacher with his students. The funeral service of Ryan is returned to my lobe and I break down on the trail out. The week didn't get any better.

May 2007 or may be April 2007--Gary undergoes surgery to remove his stomach. Upon opening him up, the doctor is shocked and removes his stomach and half his pancreas. Gary is given one year to live.

May 2007--A bunch of us participate in the Relay For Life in honor of Gary. We raised 3,500 dollars + for cancer. It was a remarkable event. Gary, a week out of the hospital, did the survivor lap and the last morning lap. His pace was hard to keep up with.

June 2007--Gary has developed additional lumps in his stomach region. Gary is given 3-4 months to live without treatment. Treatment would add 2 weeks. They forgo treatment. Gary returns to his stomping grounds in the East and enjoys days of fishing.

June 2007--Someone, Owen, else I went to school with dies in a car accident.

July 2, 2007--Gary journeys on into his next world looking upon us. His memorial service is a gathering of love, friendship, and his spirit.

And today is July 14, 2007---my tears have slowed, my heart has stopped hurting as much, my hernia pain comes and goes still, but I am feeling better. I have learned to stop and smell the roses more, take that extra moments for me, love the Earth more, and realize I am still alive and must go on.

And so that is what I am doing day by day. Each day I wake up and life gets better. I will always have those memories of those people who have gone before me, but they have all taught me to live life to the fullest and fight until the end.

May your 2007 from now on be a great one as I know mine will.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Visit Me Here

If you are stopping by, I'm too damn busy right now dealing with life...

If you want stop by here:

Monday, March 19, 2007

For the Time Being

Starting April 1, yep no joke, I am going back to work. With school bearing its weight upon me and with the season already in full swing, I feel I won't have time to write or read. And I am sorry for that. Mostly for the reading part.

Plus, I just don't feel loved with only 5 or so comments each post. Sure I am sure others read and don't post a comment, but nonetheless I don't feel Blog Loved.

I will try to pop in when I can. When I need a good laugh. But until then, I can't guarantee anything.

And yes, when I have a really good story of something stupid a Touron did, I will drop by my site and add the verbage.

Until then, wake to the sun each morning, smile in the mirror, tell yourself you look damn good, and walk on.

Monday, February 12, 2007

City Girl Fantasy

For those of you that read my blog, you may have remembered this. Well, I went back to visit some of those folks. Although we had a get together, it was nothing like that night. But there was a different reason I went back. And I will warn you right now....

Ever since I saw the Horse Whisper with Robert Redford, I have wanted to brand a calf.
In 2006 I had arranged to brand a calf with Tim. However, I had to go off to Belize to relax instead. I contacted Lisa and asked if she could set it back up with Tim for 2007. And so the plane ticket was purchased, rental vehicle reserved, and the beer bought. I arrived on Thursday, partied with the Tequila gang on Friday, and prepared for the branding on Saturday.
I would say the saddest part for me was in the morning when I watched the mommy cows run to the fence as their babies were loaded onto the trailer. The rest was just fine. A lot of people thought I was going to puke because of the smell, but really it didn't smell that bad. I actually didn't gag until Lisa pulled the oysters out of the can that had been sitting out all day and dumped them in her sink. Then I gagged. NOTE: oysters=cow balls
And so the day began...cows were roped, given antibiotics, brands, and balls clipped if they had them. According to a video I have, once the calf was roped it took approximately 1 minute to complete giving the calf two shots, a brand, and the ball clip.

And then it was my is important to get that brand just right. I only got to do one, but that was fine with me. I lived out my fantasy.
I also gave one shot. And then I got to hold the bucket that the oysters were placed in and spray antibacterial spray on the area afterwards. Now that is where you should have all expected me to gag and puke, but I did not.
The crew branded 87 head. On a trip back to drop off the calves to their moms, this vehicle was parked on the side of the road. They had seen the herd of moms come running over to the fence before we arrived. After Tim dropped off their babies, the vehicle pulled over and asked me how those moms knew their calves were coming. I said well, we took them this morning, and I am sure they could hear their ballings. As they drove off and Tim pulled up, I said City Folk. My sister reminded me I was no 'country bunkin' when I told her the story, but I admitted I was a city girl living out a fantasy.
When we finished all the duties, we headed back to the ranch house for beers, dinner, and dessert. And I listened to all the stories from the old times before I was even a glimmer in my dad's eyes.

Check out further photos here

Thursday, February 08, 2007


Matted Spam over yonder Tagged Me. I have to say it is the first time I have realized that I have been tagged. I don't keep up every day or week with my blog friends so I might have been tagged before and never realized it. And then again, I asked her if she actually meant me.

I'm supposed to list 6 weird things about me then tag 6 other people. I am pretty normal, but what the heck...And you six have been tagged...

Mary Whines

1. Like Matted, I am an organization freak. I would say I am borderline OCD (obessive complusive disorder). I actually wrote that in a job application recently. I once had an anxiety attack over the soap being on the wrong side of the sink.

2. I dip my grilled cheese sandwiches, made only on white bread with sliced Kraft cheese, in ketsup. Where I learned it I don't know because my sister, Amy, who had a strong hand in my upbringing doesn't do it.

3. I have been reincarnated. I truly believe that I was once Joan of Arc because I can't stand fire.

4. I have 10 toes, but only 9 toenails. Which I don't think that is quite that weird, but I am digging here.

5. I am the youngest of 7. And in some ways the blacksheep---5 tattoes, belly button piercing, and work 1/2 a year.

6. I am an overachiever. Which might not sound weird, but I am taking two online course this semester and was primarily finished with them before they even started. I asked my teacher if I was the only one who did that and he said yes.

And those are my stupid 6 weird things.


I've been slacking on my blog readings lately. And I don't know why considering I don't have a job anymore. Of course lately, I have had to move a few people down to MIA section because they are either gone or quit writing. But this week, this day, I have plenty of time since the only time I am getting out of bed is to pee.

I've been having some problems lately in the lower right quadrant of my abdomen. So after seeing the female doctors, the 4 vaginal ultrasounds, the 2 normal ultrasounds, the numerous pelvic exams, I went and saw a surgeon. He determined it was a hernia.

So yesterday I went under the knife and had it repaired. And I hope to hell that it heals quickly because the pain fricking sucks. It isn't that bad if I am laying here or sitting up, but as soon as I have to move it is bad. I've been drinking a ton of water so I have to pee like every 10-20 minutes. Which, yea, means I am hydrated, but also means I about cry trying to get there. Anyway, I will be down and out for a while.

I was going to have it done a couple weeks ago, but I had plans to brand a cow and the doctor didn't think it would be a good idea to get nudged with a nose or hoof. So the branding story will follow. I am working with Se7en to see how to place a video on the blog.

Have a good weekend.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007


Arf Folks:

I know I haven't written in a while, but I haven't had anything too exciting to write home about in a while, except today topped everything. I will have to start my story from about 3 years ago...

Approximately 3 years ago, someone dropped me off, abandoned me, well basically did not want me anymore. I was picked up by the dog catcher. Accompanying me when I was picked up was a dog who looked just like me except he had a boy thing and I have a girl thing. Hence, our names. We were called brother and sister and sent to doggie jail. But in our town, dogs don't sit in jail too long. They are either adopted or fostered. One of my mom's friends was heavily involved with the Humane Society and took mom down to see me. Mom fell in love with me so she brought down boyfriend who brought down son. And well the rest of the story is obvious. I was adopted. My brother....well about a week later mom called to see if he had been adopted. He had been. And so the long search begun for me to be reunited with him.

My mom figured with all the walks we did and the town only being approximately 7000 strong that we would run into him. But we never did. However, the other day mom was down at the bakery doing some eating and studying when she looked outside to see the spitting image of me tied to the bike rack. Actually mom likes to call it the dog rack, but anyway, there was this dog. She was positive it was my brother. She immediately asked everyone in the restaurant, but it was no one's. Mom kept watching to see if the owner would come back. Mom got up to go to the restroom and in the backroom on the computers was a guy. She broke away from her shy mold and asked if that was his dog outside. He said yes. She asked all the appropriate questions: did he get it at the humane society, was his name Tigger, etc. All the answers were yes. Mom told him that she had his sister. I'm just going by what mom has told me now, but they talked and exchanged numbers.

Last night I listened as mom talked on the telephone. I heard her say something about the Walking Place and meeting at 9am. I thought "that is the time we go for walks. why is she making plans on my time." Then she hung up and talked to me about it. She said I was going to meet my brother.

We arrived at the walking place and we only walked a little bit. I kept looking at her and wondering why she wasn't going further. And then another car pulled into the parking area. I watched as a dog got out of the vehicle and I got down in my attack position. I slowly walked that way and then I realized. My tail started going 100 mph and I ran up to him. His name is Farley now.

I am still a little cuter, but we look a lot alike. Our parents took us for a good walk. And we pretty much explored on our own, but occasionally crossed paths. It was when we returned to the vehicles that we started to play and wrestle like brother and

sister. We did that for about 20 minutes as our parents laughed and talked about us.

Then it was time to go. First I got in my vehicle and Farley got in with me. Then he went over to his vehicle. And I stood by mine and watched with sad eyes as he climbed into his vehicle. I couldn't handle it anymore and ran over there and crawled in with him. I didn't want to be separated again. Mom got me in our vehicle and I looked out the back window watching once again as he was taken from me.

I have been kind of sad since returning home, letting out big sighs, wondering where he went, will I ever see him again, etc. Mom tells me that I will see him again. Mom wonders if this was the right thing to do since I am now sad, but she thinks as more time is spent with him and then him leaving, we will realize it isn't forever again.

Click on the title to see more photos of us.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

How's that New Year

Well you know for me, it hasn't started out the best. First, just before the new year Jenna took me out playing running in circle at Mach 1. I am still having foot and sometimes knee problems with that.

I remember laying on the ground. I remember certain things, but not all. I remember her laying away from me. I remember my sis, Amy, calling 911. I remember the fire truck pulling up. I remember the drugs. I remember making a u-turn. I remember getting to the hopsital. I remember Johnny Crutch. That's about it.

I don't remember getting to keep the 30 dollar blanket that was used to help support my leg. I don't understand why it cost 600 dollars to be driven 3 miles. I don't understand why it was 1100 dollars for the ER visit. And to think of it, I haven't gotten the doctor's bill or Johnny Crutches. I just have to say THANK GOODNESS for insurance that probably won't cover shit. I wait and wonder: if it doesn't cut it, how am I, the unemployed child going to pay for it.

Since June when I had a cyst burst on my right ovary, I have continued to have pain there. Well, I pretty much have had pain there before that, but the cyst took pain to a new level. Anyway, I have had about 4 vaginal ultrasounds and 3 normal ones. Really the vaginal aren't that bad because they primarily stick a dildo up you and check things out. But they weren't finding anything. And the pain continued. So now the doctor has decided on February 7th, some exploratory surgery will be conducted and if anything, a possible hernia, is found then they will repair. Besides my wisdom teeth, it will be the first time I am put under. Looking forward to it? Hell, if it takes the pain away I am all for it.

Happy Fricking New Year.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

End of Road Trip

We stayed in Phoenix after our last post. I had a family reunion to attend and so I brought along the boyfriend to meet the family. On Friday, we hung out with Rachel and she loved having Jenna around to walk and play with. One of the things we did was to get Jenna running fast in circles and Rachel loved it laughing hysterically. That led to the fiasco on Saturday.

We went to Railroad Park for a picnic and playtime with the family. Jenna was allowed to come along which I think she enjoyed thoroughly to a certain extent. Rachel and I took Jenna over the hill to let her play for a while off her leash. And so I got Jenna running in circles. And she was running about Mach 1 when...

She ran straight into my left knee and lifted me into the air. I am hoping I didn't cuss, but deep down I am sure I was. I yelled for Rachel to go get her mom. When Rachel told her mom, she initially thought we were playing a joke. Somehow I was able to get the leash back on Jenna. I remember Polly coming and then her calling for Murray. I remember him coming and then I remember them calling 911. And then I think the hotties showed up, but I don't remember too much after that. I remember contemplating whether I wanted to go to the hospital and making an effort to move to stand up, but it hurt too damn much. I remember my brand new pair of jeans being split up the side. The next thing I knew the IV was in and we were heading to the hospital. I remember hottie talking to me about hunting in the La Sals which is near Moab. And I remember being wheeled into the ER room.

After x-rays and more drugs, Johnny Crutch came in to size me for a knee brace and crutches. I had to pee terribly and wanted to get down there. He wanted me to take it slow. Once back in the room, he continued to talk and I finally had to lay back down and close my eyes because I kept picturing puking on his head. I opted for the wheel chair to the lobby where I felt I was going to puke.

My sister finally came and we went to her house. Jenna was freaked out in the vehicle and visibly upset, but I was able to get her calmed down. And I even went to the evenings activities. The four beers and hydrocodone made me fall asleep quickly when we finally got home at 3 a.m.

Sunday night I was sick of the crutches and decided I could walk on the leg. My family didn't think it was a good idea and since I was in mass pain by the end of the night, they were right for once. I made it to midnight and then went home for another wonderful night on the couch.

We left Phoenix and the warmth on Monday morning one hour behind our scheduled departure time. That is about all I know because I slept the entire way. Wanted to say sorry to Jeff and Jacob for not being able to see them at the park even though I believe they saw me laying on the ground.

Hope everyone had a great New Year.