Wednesday, December 29, 2004

I've Overcome, But This is Gross

For those 2 or 3 people that read my post, remember this one: PoopIssue

Well this morning I pretty much overcame that I believe. At 5 or may be it was 4 A.M. I awoke this morning with one thought in my mind...I am going to puke soon. I laid in bed and listened as BF slept soundly next to me. I tried not to move too much. At 5:53 A.M. I moved quarters into the bathroom. I slapped the pillow next to the toilet because when I puke I pass out and bang my head around. Not bad on carpet, but tile sucks.

I laid on the floor with blanket and actually asked to puke rather than lie in wait. My stomach was bloated and I was generously realizing the bloat. At some point...ok this going to get a little gross...I sat down upon the toilet and pretty much vomited liquid out my ass. I am not kidding you when I say this went on for about 20 minutes straight.

And then I felt a short time I would be vomiting out both ends at the same time. I reached for the trashcan because the bathtub was just too far over to reach without shooting whatever liquid was coming from the other end onto the wall.

Remember I pass out when I puke. In years before, I have passed out and seized or passed out and continued to throw up. When I was a child, I would yell for my daddy. While in college (and not puking from drinking) I would call a friend to come over and hang out for the day. There have been times when I have passed out for hours. So little to say, I enjoy some company to make sure things come out alright, no pun intended.

I screamed BF's name as the first wave of vomit exited my mouth. And he came running in the bathroom immediately. Remember, I am still on the toilet having vomit ass as well. He didn't hestitate when I asked for the glass of water and a wash cloth. I was shaking. And he warmed the water before giving me the wash cloth. When I felt I was going to be ok, I said I was ok and he went back to lay in bed until I gather my composure to face him.

We laid in bed for a while and I told him to go back to sleep. I went back to the bathroom to vomit out my ass. I hate being sick. Now, I enjoy taking naps every day, but that is my choice to lay in bed. I hate it when I have to lay in bed and completely still.

And right now, I hate it more than ever because I have been away from BF for 5 days and tomorrow we both drive separate ways for another 10 days. We see each other on the 9th and then I fly to Another State on the 10th and will be gone for approximately a week.

Anyway, I think I have overcome the pooping issue. I mean as my friend, Booby, said when I told him about it "now that is true love". And it is because I have been waited on all day and I am not milking it. Ok, may be a little I am.

Tuesday, December 28, 2004

The Long, But Beautiful Drive Back

I awoke this morning at what I thought was 630am. I didn't realize it was really 730 until I flipped open the phone. I had to stop at the lab for some routine blood work and to pee in a cup and then it would be a relaxing 5 hour drive to Moab.

I stopped to gas up and get something to eat because I had just fasted for 12 hours. I went inside to pay and when I returned heard this noise. I can't even describe it, but when I realized where it was coming from I decided I should stop it. The guy on the other side of my pump left his nozzle unattended and it was overflowing considerably. I moved over and clicked it off just as he came around the vehicle from where he was sitting and went to grab it. All I could think of was static electricity and he was going to be on fire shortly. Thank goodness it didn't happen. He then continued to fill up his tank. I was dumbfounded. And when I told the cashiers inside they put kitty litter on it. Bet that stuff masks the smell.

I headed out on the open road. Ever feel like you are the only person on the road even though people are flying by you? And then when someone does something stupid, you think 'that person thinks he/she is the only person out here'.

The weather was a little dreary, but nonetheless beautiful in its own rite. The sky was quilted with clouds as well as down balls preparing to make more quilts. The blue was scattered around and it was the most vivid light blue I've seen in a long time. The red rocks were not shining and glowing the awesome red, but they had another hue that was just as nice.

I came around the corner outside of Kayenta and viewed an Indian ruin I had not seen before. And then Tsegi canyon which always leaves me breathless and saying 'I want to hike up there'. Unfortunately, it is not allowed. I stopped in Kayenta for a drink at Sonic because they have crushed ice and I am addicted to crushed ice. Instead of turning on 163, I drove straight. The Navajo hitchhiker I had picked up asked if I had been through that way and I said only in the dark. He said you need to do it when it is light out and he was correct. There was so much I had not seen before. Normally in Kayenta I gas up, but today I decided not to. It is always when you play it close that the gas gauge drops considerably quicker than normal.

As I was driving through Bluff, I noticed a cemetery on top of a hill. Bluff is a very old and historic Mormon town of Utah so I turned around and decided to stretch my legs with the dead. I will tell you that the dead have a beautiful view of the valley. And just down from them is an Indian ruin with a great Kiva. I wonder if the whites and reds meet up each night to tell stories of the old days. Would I love to be there for those stories! I had no idea that the ruin was there so I need to go back sometime and check it out with the tour. Tour only, which doesn't mean stupid people don't clamor around there anyway. The oldest grave I found was 1820, Nelson, and he was one of the founding individuals that was sent out to find the place. There was also an individual who had participated in the Mexican War of 1846. MexicanWar and TheView

And that got me to thinking, if he wouldn't have fought, I might not be living in Utah. And I wondered where I would be living. I would probably still be back in Iowa. And heck if it weren't for the Mormons who fought during that time then Utah might not be Utah. Interesting to ponder no matter where you live.

I drove on at the speed limit because from Bluff to Moab the UHP and Sheriff are a plenty. I stopped in Blanding for gas and then traveled past over 500 storage sheds toward Monticello. Wonder why I included the storage sheds. The Mormons stop pile a year's supply of food. And I think that is what is in those storage sheds. The town only has like 3000 people.

In Monticello, I had a blue pickup pass me probably doing 50 miles an hour in a 30. And then shortly thereafter a blue car passed me. I was doing 80 at the time because I have to speed up going down the hills to get the Rocket up the hills. I smiled because I knew that at least one if not both would be pulled over at some point before Moab. I was also going through my mind how I was going to handle the accident they were most likely going to cause. The blue car was pulled over about 20 miles outside of Moab and upon reaching Moab another officer was pulled over on the side of the road. I assumed he was finishing up the ticket of the blue pickup.

Coming down the hill into the valley, I had to pull over to the side of the road because white car was driving in my lane. The crazy thing is that she really didn't correct the action, but just kept driving in my lane. I have done it. Looking at something in the distance, hell minutes before I had done it looking at a tree, but I always put up my hand like sorry I was being an idiot. Nothing. Just casual as can be. I just let it slide.

I am home now and the weather is just beautiful. I have already started laundry and repacking because I am leaving on the 30th for Vegas. I hope every one has a wonderful New Year Eve and New Years. Be safe. FullMoon

Monday, December 27, 2004

Traditions of Christmas-What's yours?

As the post below said, I drove from Moab to Phoenix. My sisters all live in Phoenix and that is where we usually meet for Christmas. For one, it is warm there. I mean Christmas day was 65 degrees and no wind chill factor. (That is a family joke).

On I-17 there is a location where I love the tradition that comes into view during that drive. Someone, and no one has any idea who, has a tradition of decorating a large juniper tree every year. One day it isn't, the next day it is. No one knows who does it. There is speculation. But I think not knowing is the excitement of seeing it during the drive. And it has become a tradition for people to go with their families up to the tree each year. Just to view it. As I drove down this year I thought, geez, what if they didn't decorate it this year. And what happens--is it passed down from generation to generation? I hope to continue to see it every year that I do that drive.

So what is your tradition?

There are many traditions and some I don't know if they are traditions. First, we make butter cookies and frost them. I think they are better frosted. And then you freeze them. BF thought I was crazy until he tasted one and then realized I was right. (Well, I am female.) But we've made butter cookies from as long as I can remember. When my nephew and I would make them, if we broke them during frosting, we got to eat them. A lot of them got broken.

Again, what is your Christmas family tradition?

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Happy New Year

This morning I left Moab, UT and headed south to Phoenix. It is about a 7 hour drive, a little more with gas ups and short stops to pick up the Navajo hitch hikers. This drive, 466.5 miles, is through some of the most beautiful country of Utah and Arizona. And it was during these approximately 7 hours and 466.5 miles that I had quite a bit of time to reflect and think. Between flipping through my XM stations and the beauty of the land, I reflected about my life, but there was one thought that kept coming through my mind...

No matter how difficult your year was. No matter how far in debt you went. No matter how much weight you gained. No matter how much time you spent in depression. No matter how difficult your life seemed. No matter how old you turned this year. Primarily, no matter can't be that terrible because you are alive to read this. And I am not saying that this is going to be some grand writing. What I am saying is that you are alive. So you accomplished something great.

You made it another year. So somehow you are smarter. Somehow you are brighter. Somehow you are wiser. Somehow you survived. And so I congratulate you and welcome you to another year. Have a Happy New Year.

Monday, December 20, 2004

Christmas Time Blahs

I hate Christmas time. I am a major scrooge. Most of all I hate Christmas music. Every place plays it from telephone recorders to stores. It drives me insane. And I don't know why, but I just hate it.

Christmas got different for me I suppose after I learned the truth. But I doubt it. We have 6 siblings. And some of them have children. So once we got of age (18 in my book), we all started drawing names. Then we would just buy for one person. But it got stupid--Hey what do you want? It was nothing about thoughfulness or giving. Then we went to the theme Christmas--PJs one year and sports equipment the next. It got too difficult to make up themes so we gave those up as well. Now we barely do anything for each other. The nieces and nephews under 18 still get something. I went simple this year and they all received gift cards.

My family (sisters and b-i-ls) did start adopting a family every year. Someone that needed more than we did. Hell, we didn't even celebrate Christmas anymore in my book. I believe once they decided instead of just sponsoring a family for Christmas to sponsor the family for the entire year. In my book, this is what Christmas is all about. They still do it every year. Sometimes I participate, sometimes I don't. It really has to do with my job situation. This year things are not going well for me so I didn't participate, but I know they did.

I head to Phoenix on Wednesday for the warmth and Christmas time. We will spend the Eve at one sisters. Sometimes we theme that as well for the dinner. And then Christmas day at my other sister house. Open present, eat butter cookies, eat dinner, and play games and croquet until 4am. Doesn't sound bad does it.

I decided to make my annual calendar this year. I put everyone's birthdays on it and a photo or more. This year because of money, it was only one page. One year, I filled the entire calendar with photos of me. I thought it was a good idea. But I also made a little gift box of lotion, bubble bath, and soap. Good stuff. The boxes came out pretty good I think. But it was the throught of GIVING.

I suppose if I had children I would be may be more into it, but I don't. So I am a scrooge at Christmas. The thing I am going to enjoy the most is hitting the movies on Christmas Day with family. And we aren't even Jewish.

Everyone have a great holiday. I will no matter what because the weather I sure is going to be better than it is right now.

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

From a Dog's Point of View

I woke up this morning and yawned a loud one to wake up the two legged creatures sleeping in the comfortable place above me. It took several tries before I was able to get one of them out of the comfortable place and take me outside. The one creature often stays in the comfortable place for a few more hours and sometimes returns there after our walk. Anyway, the creature that got up, I'll call it boy, forgot to feed me before boy left for where ever he goes each morning.

Finally, the other creature, named girl, got up and sat down on that stupid chair and started looking at that blank screen. I went back and forth from the room that holds my food to her, but she didn't get the clue that may be I was hungry. I eventually gave up because she just wasn't getting it. I looked outside and could tell it was a great day and wondered why the hell I had to be cooped up inside all day. Build the damn fence so I can play in the backyard all day two-legged creatures.

Finally, girl got up and took off something to put something else on. She put those things on her feet and I knew then we were at least headed outside. About arfing time. Finally she told me to get in the thing that moves and I jumped right in. Unknown to the two-legged creatures, I played them up big time for a while pretending I couldn't jump into the vehicle so they would have to lift me. Sometimes I still try it, but they got smart and won't allow me to. I was placed in the backseat which I normally get to ride in the front. Bitch.

We drove through town and stopped at the same damn places we stopped yesterday. We go to the same place each day except Sunday. She goes in and comes right back out. Sometimes with things, sometimes without. And as we drive, she talks to me like I am going to answer her back. "Do you want to go for a walk?" Well, yes stupid I want to go for a walk every damn day. Finally, we are headed to where I want to go. Canyon

This is one of my favorite places to explore because it has water the entire way and I can splash and run around in it. Water When I get wet I go insane and run in circles real fast. Anyway, we went to the M. Creek. I get to stay off the leash unless another person is coming or I get in trouble (which I did today). She kept calling my name to stay in view, but there was too much to explore. And why should I wait for her, she should keep up with me.

She insisted on crossing over to the left and going up that canyon today. We crossed over eventually and then had to come right back around. Unfortunately she didn't fall in the water because that would have been damn funny. So we went up the right fork as usual, but we went a lot farther this time. And that is when I got in trouble because I wasn't staying in her eyesight just in case people came. Anyway, I was only on the leash for a short while and it taught me to stay close. If I got too far ahead where I couldn't see the slower two-legged creature, I waited until I could and then went on. Why they went to walking on two legs is beyond me. You can go much faster on four legs. Four legs ruled way before two. Waterfall

She kept stopping to take photos, whatever the heck those are, and occasionally made me stop for her to take one of me. We finally finished up the hike and the two two-legged creatures finally put together I hadn't eaten. So we came home and I was finally fed. I am currently resting my wet body on their clothes on the floor. It sure is warmer this way. Rockforms and Deadtree and Snowmtn and another snowmtn

I wonder if they will remember my dinner tonight and take me for another walk tomorrow. Wish me arf!

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

I Long For Warmth

I look out the window and see the backyard spectacled with whiteness. And then I look further or is it farther out across the backyard to the cliff face in the distance and see it blanketed with whiteness. The sun is barely shining on the cliff face. I haven't been outside yet today, but making an assumption, which is strictly against the Four Agreements, I would say it is cloudy. At some godly (do you capitalize it when you are using it in that form) hour this morning, I took out the dog to the freezing rain. Thank goodness BF's body temperature is 900 degrees so I had something to warm myself up again. The high today is supposed to be 41 and the low 31. Not much of a change, but enough for me to complain and bitch. If you read Green you might come away with that he doesn't like the cold. But who the hell does like 3 degrees. My real question is was that really the temperature or did he make it up. (That is an inside joke with us). I leave tomorrow to head to Phoenix.

THURSDAYHi: 64°Lo: 46°Sunny
FRIDAYHi: 68°Lo: 52°Sunny
SATURDAYHi: 75°Lo: 54°Sunny
SUNDAYHi: 75°Lo: 53°Sunny

Yea, I think I am going to hate those temperatures. NOT! (Remember when that was such a cool word). I am going to be able to go out of the house without 12 shirts, 2 of those long underwear, 3 jackets, 5 pairs of gloves, 16 socks, and a stocking cap. As you might notice, my body temperature is not 900 degrees. I have lived in the desert for so long that I think I am part snake and should hibernate in the winter. My BF doesn't understand why I sleep all day---well besides being clinically depressed---it is a lot warmer in the bed.
I look at the temperatures above in purple. Several things stand out...

1. SUNNY times 4
2. The low is higher than our high
3. SUNNY times 4
4. 75 degrees
5. SUNNY times 4

BF might be driving back to Utah by himself. I mean hey I am not working so I really don't have to get back to anything right away. I might just stay in the warmth. Unfortunately, my sister rented out my room to another family member so I guess I will come back to the cold, which will be even colder at SUNNY 75 degree temperatures.

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

December 7th

I used to work at a juvenile detention center when I lived in Phoenix. I worked in a specialized unit of the facility instead of the normal units. We dealt with substance abuse issues during the week and repeat and first time offenders during the weekends. During the day, the juveniles were taken out of the facility for community service projects, educational trips, and once a week we went to the Federal Prison. Sometimes one of the members of the afternoon crew would go with the group.

On December 7, 2000 Dave and I would be the ones accompanying the juveniles to the prison. When we arrived at the prison, we were met by Chuck who would usher us into the prison visitor area. As we had walked into the prison, we noticed their flag was flying at half-mast. Dave asked Chuck if they had an officer killed? Chuck said no, why? And Dave responded that their flag was lowered. It was one of those moments where 'here is your sign' is kind of appropriate it. Chuck said 'it is Pearl Harbor Day. OUCH!

I told that to another colleague and said I was never going to forget December 7th again in my life. The following year on December 7th that colleague called me. She started with small talk and then asked me what the day was? I said I have no idea and what was she talking about. She threw 'here is your sign' in my face again.

However, these days I don't forget December 7th because our country might be a little different if those men and women would not have sacarficed their lives. And so I thank them not only on December 7th, but on every day that I wake up.

Thursday, December 02, 2004

Pop Rocks-Strawberry Flavored

I remember the first time I really tried the pop rocks. I was somewhere between the fourth and sixth grade. Ok, so I don't remember the exact date, but it was when I was in elementary school. I do remember the first time I put them in my mouth and kissed someone else with them in his mouth. I remember exactly where I was and remember it like it was yesterday. I was in sixth grade.

And the cool thing to do back then was to go to the Roller Palace which was this open air skating rink. We would often sneak out and head to the mini-mart up the street for candy and stuff. Why? Not real sure because it was all sold right there. I remember sneaking out back to make out and almost always getting caught.

Wow, life was different back then. It was fun and peaceful and we didn't have to worry about getting into a fight and then being shot later that evening.

Anyway, I was sitting near the bathroom over in a corner and I put the pop rocks in my mouth. I can't remember the flavor, but I would say probably strawberry once again. I remember Sean Bard, who is likely in jail these days put them in his mouth as well. And then we kissed. I really don't remember the whole outcome of the experiment.

But after giving pop rocks another experiment last night I am sure it didn't really work back in sixth grade either. Being in my sixth life and a bit older and more experience in the world of kissing, we gave pop rocks a try last night. As adults you can use your imagination. My father reads this site so I am not going to go into detail.

I will tell you that it was fun, but it is an experiment I don't recommend. There were pop rocks everywhere and they were stuck to everything. I am sure for the next week we will be finding them even though we changed the sheets.

I live by the motto: don't knock it until you have tried it. I tried it and although fun I don't ever need to try it again.